Menhera

I found a fashion I really like.  Its called Menhera. Its based more around creepy cute/sickly. Its influenced around bandages and sickness. I really like it. It also does look really cute with pastel goth. :)0 00

I really don't know to much more about it, but it does make me feel better as someone with mental illness to see a fashion thats out there, that other mentally ill people have gone to and have felt more comfortable or okay with wearing. 

Oh yeah, and I also like it because I've found so much nurse kei pieces I want. <3

TV shows I'm Into

One of the two series I've been watching lately is How to get away with murder. I've been watching it with my boyfriend and girlfriend. Its a really good show, I really like the way they unfold the story and how you get to learn about characters as they also unveil the death of a character and how it happened, and more so why. 

Its a really good story, and I really like all of the characters, I also like it because it casts lawyers as cunning and 'creative' individuals. I also really like the variety of cast and the fact that the teacher is a women who will fight and figure out underhanded ways to win her cases. 

I also really like the gay characters. (spoilers for my gf and bf. )

This is a show I've really gotten into. There is only two seasons so far, the next season starts in oct. But its really good. I really liked the scream movies, and I really love this tv show. It does get more gore-y while you watch it. The start is rather mellow and a lot more a suspense. But I do like! Its really really good. 

I'm on season two already.

dresser!

This is my new dresser my boyfriend got me. Its really cute, its dark chocolate brown, and its really tall. My clothes finally have a home, after years and years, someone finally got me my very own dresser. I love it.

I feel so happy. I'm moving into my boyfriends place next month. (oct) Officially. although I basically live here already. But I'll be on the lease and I'll be on signed documents and stuff. >W< I'm so excited!

Oh, and my boyfriend and I are also looking for a book shelf, and I still remember he needs a lamp.

New Photos of me

Cat mermaids

my two most favorite things is Cats and I also really love mermaids. So I was really excited when my girlfriend bought me something that had both of these themes.

She got me a cup, of cat mermaids, I mean purr maids, and she also got me some purrmaids contaniers, they are so cute. I don't think I'm going to use them for food. I have the big one, it has sewing supplies in it, the next biggest one has video games, and then the smallest one has some necklaces. :) 

I really adore my cat mermaids. They make me happy.

Trauma Lives in My Body. Does it Live in Yours?

When I open up about trauma, what I've gone though,  my child hood, my life. When I open up about the torture I've gone though and the layers of hatred I've faced and the ignorance and arrogance of people. Along with the psychical, mental and sexual trauma.

I feel like I'm opening up unhealed scars. I'm allowing people to look at bruises that never really healed, wounds that forever be dripping and oozing.  I'm allowing people to see me at my weakest part, and I feel like as I open up about my trauma, I'm also uncovering marks and showing them off, but at the same time. I want someone to kiss and tell me my marks don't matter. Or that they don't make me weak.

Because what happened to me made me feel weak. disgusting. stupid. A freak. I feel worthless.

I have a lot of grief and blame with my trauma. I still hate myself for stuff thats happened. I still choke on tears and angry, I sometimes can not find the tears I search for, the cries I can not make. I can still feel the marks, the scraps, the bruises, the beatings. I can still feel it.

I guess apart of me has always hoped that Trauma might end up moving out, let those scars be scars. Not have remaining a live bits go and survivor. Sometimes when I open up, I feel like I'm playing a game show, like survivor and I'm going to be kicked off of my own island.

drink

I found out there is a energy drink that is called "Joker". I saw it and I originally wanted to show my girlfriend it, cause I thought it was cool and shes really big into batman right now too.

 Its really good, it tastes a little like red bull, but I didn't get a tummy ache from drinking it. (I tend to get a really bad tummy ache drinking red bull) But I love this drink. Its really yummy,

Suicide Squad

I saw Suicide Squad the first week it came out. I got to see it with my girlfriend and I really did like the movie. Its not the best movie, but its pretty good. I did like it just because it was super bad guys. I also really liked it because I love Harley Quinn and I was finally happy to see a movie that she'd be a main character in.

I was a little sad that they didn't share much about the other characters. It would be cool if they did a spin off to give us details of the other bad guys. I'm also excited because I heard that the lady who played Harley Quinn wants to do a movie of super bad guys that are girls. <3 so maybe we'll see Poison Ivy and a Harley Quinn relationship on the screen, or Poison ivy flirting with Batman.

Also I'm totally glad that the movie has came out and there is cute outfit peices cause I really like the "Daddy's Little Monster" stuff. I have a really cute pantie and bra set that says daddy's lil monster.

Lush

So I've finally been able to spurg and buy myself some lush bath bombs. I feel so excited and happy, I also can't wait to use them.  I haven't used bath bombs in awhile.But yeah, I can't wait to try the twilight one. It smells so good, and the sex bomb looks so freaking cute.