My Patronous

I love Harry Potter and I'm totally excited for Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them.  I also recently re-watched the Harry Potter series with my boyfriend and I decided to look at the pottermore website to see if anything is new that's up. I was excited to see you can finally get your own patronus. So I poked the buttons and I found out my Patronous is...

A dolphin! Which is really neat and I'm super happy cause dolphins are one of my favorite animals. I also didn't know a dolphin could be a patronous so it makes me really happy. I also really like revisiting the site and clicking to cast my patronous.  I've been doing that a bit when I start thinking about trauma.

You also can read about your patronous here: https://www.quotev.com/story/3671161/Patronuses-and-Meanings/1

Fall Smells

So I bought a couple of smell-y fall things for me to enjoy. I really love fall and I love smells, and with rain coming soon I thought it would be really nice to buy some nommy and calm smelling candles. I only grabbed two. 

These two, I think I might go back and grab another one. I'm not sure. But I do love the smell of these two. I might see if they have any thanksgiving scents. Cause that holiday will be coming up quickly once OCT gets here! 

I also got this. But the bottle doesn't stay attached to the witch hat. So now I just have a witch hat dangling from my bag. <3 It also smells so yummy! 

Take Care

I feel like its taken me years to really understand this, and to really understand the meaning behind taking care of ones needs. I'm someone who people pleases and I really feel like If I can't, then i'm not a good person.

But one of the things I've been learning, and I hear time and time again is look after yourself. I read this in self help books, I hear this in groups, I hear this from doctors. I hear this on the internet, and in videos about mental health. I hear it all the time. Take care of yourself. You come first.

But I've never been one to really apply it. Take it to heart, and hold it there. Listen for sounds and signs that I'm not taking care of myself. Because at the end of the day, who I am doesn't matter. Its who I please. Its who I make happy. Because without them, I'm no one. Right?

Nope, Wrong. 

I found this out this weekend.

You need to take care of yourself.

Because no one else is going to.

No one is going to know how you feel mentally.

Sure someone, and people can see when you are physically sick. when you are puking.

But your body also tells you way before everyone else sees you vomit that you aren't okay. 

Your head feels fuzzy, maybe you feel woozy. Those people don't know it. Unless you describe it. Those people don't know. Unless you say 'hey i'm feeling...'. Doctors don't even know whats wrong unless you tell them symptoms. But this is just that.

I need to learn to listen to my body better.  

I need to take care of me.

If I'm anxious, I need to take care of myself.

If I'm stressed I need to take care of myself.

If I'm depressed I need to take care of myself.

If I'm triggered I need to take care of myself.

The fact is, I'm on earth to take care of me. 

If you lived a long life and a happy, healthy life by taking care of people. Professionals, doctors, teachers, and so on. Wouldn't ever get sick.

Taking care of myself isn't selfish. 

Its not. 

Its not rude either.  

Law and Order SVU

`

One of the shows that has helped me with my healing from my sexual assault is law and order SVU.  A lot of the time when Benson is talking to female victims and validates them and fights for them, I feel like shes talking to me as a victim. What I went though made me feel really gross and like what happened to me was my fault and I`m to blame.  I still feel like this sometimes. But when she talks to victims, it makes me feel better.

I know they don`t do mother on daughter crime in the show. (Or at least I don`t think so, I haven`t seen it) but thank you SVU for validating the feelings of a victim. 

Fall Bucket List

• Go on a fall nature walk and take photographs of nature.
• Go to a pumpkin patch.
• Make yummy holiday food like: Soups, Chili, Caramel and candy apples, Halloween Cookies, Pie, and Cinnamon buns! and much more!
• Make homemade apple cider 
• Go to Vancouver for the Halloween&expo !
• Watch Halloween movies
• Buy some halloween products. :x
• Watch Scream (New season comes out soon!)
• Eat Roasted chest nuts
• Do a mountain hike and get to the top and look around at all of the pretty colors.
• Read fall/witch/halloween/creep themed book
• Celebrate the Autumn equinox 
• Decorate for halloween
• Corn maze!
• Thanksgiving picnic!
• Evil Acres
• Color a full halloween coloring book
• Try doing some fall/autumn/halloween crafts
• Wear mori kei
• Go for a walk on the break water
• Do holiday baking:
• Go Star Gazing
• Buy a holiday flavored tea
• Buy holiday lush product
• Buy/find old copies of the scary stories to tell in the dark and read them out loud together.
• Celebrate Samhain

:) This is some stuff I want to do for the fall!

Sands

Beach Sand: Use for calming or anxiety spells to gradually wash away and smooth out fear/negativity, for spells of change, or in magick for motivation or strength

Desert Sand: Use for cursing to “dry out” your target of wealth/luck/happiness/etc, or add to a resilience spell for the capability to grow through hard times or situations

River Sand: Use for spells that are focused on moving on physically or mentally, or for change 

and/or healing magick - Can also serve as an elemental water offering

Volcanic Sand: Use for destructive spells or curses, in magick to reveal deeper or hidden meanings/feelings, or for banishing magick - 

Beach Sand: Use for calming or anxiety spells to gradually wash away and smooth out fear/negativity, for spells of change, or in magick for motivation or strength

Desert Sand: Use for cursing to “dry out” your target of wealth/luck/happiness/etc, or add to a resilience spell for the capability to grow through hard times or situations

River Sand: Use for spells that are focused on moving on physically or mentally, or for change and/or healing magick - Can also serve as an elemental water offering

Volcanic Sand: Use for destructive spells or curses, in magick to reveal deeper or hidden meanings/feelings, or for banishing magick - Can also serve as an elemental fire offering

Heavy Mineral/Crystal Sand: (Sands with significant presence of Quartz, Garnet, Olivine, Hematite, etc.) Use in magick for personal growth, focus, or motivation. If you have a sand heavily composed of a specific gemstone (quartz, for example) usable as a substitute for that gemstone in spellwork.

Black Sand: Use for protection, banishing, or negativity-based spells

Biogenic Sand: (Sand composed majorly of bioorganisms - shells, skeletons, bones, corals, etc.) Use in magick for healing or protectionan also serve as an elemental fire offering

Heavy Mineral/Crystal Sand: (Sands with significant presence of Quartz, Garnet, Olivine, Hematite, etc.) Use in magick for personal growth, focus, or motivation. If you have a sand heavily composed of a specific gemstone (quartz, for example) usable as a substitute for that gemstone in spellwork.

Black Sand: Use for protection, banishing, or negativity-based spells

Biogenic Sand: (Sand composed majorly of bioorganisms - shells, skeletons, bones, corals, etc.) Use in magick for healing or protection

Tarot Cards

So because its halloween season. (fall) And because witchery items are going to be display in so many stores I thought I would post one of the things that are sitting my on witchy wishlist!

 I'm a witch - well a see witch. But one of the things I really want to get is a tarot deck. The deck I want is called the Wild Unkown and I really want it because its really pretty.

The art work is phenomenal! And I would love to have this be my own and only deck that I can read and work with.   I also feel really drawn to the deck, I think it would be really lovely to have this deck. I've also heard that your first deck should be a gift. 

Monster High Minis

I really like monster high, but I don't really have a lot of space to collect a bunch of dolls. I have about four, and I tend to stick to one character with the monster high dolls cause I really like Rochelle's Style the most. But I most recently found out about monster high minis and they are so cute! They are small little vinyl dolls. You get one in a package, and they are so cute.

I have 6 so far.

There is about 70+ dolls to collect and looking at the sheet there isn't any that I don't want, so this makes collecting them really fun and easy. I'm also really glad I'm getting all of the cat girls!!

There also is really cute 3 packs you can buy for 10 bucks. :)

I'm going to spend money on these once a week. I might buy the three packs and then go back to the blind ones, or collect more of the blind ones first, gah I don't know! I do enjoy the collecting of these little cuties, and I like that they don't take up much space. So keeping them and collecting them won't be that bad. 

New Apps I've been playing

So I downloaded to free apps that are a lot of fun. They also don't need wifi and they are pretty good games to poke for  a bit, but you also can leave them alone.

Its called Abyssrium, Its a lot of fun. Its a clicker based game, and you do get little skill power ups that'll increase your clicking abilities or will click for you. But what you start off with is the little rock with a face, and you buy fish and coral to make your corallita happy.  I'm really excited to keep up with this game, I'll end up earning a killer whale, and shark. You also can earn a big blue whale!

This is the other game I'm obsessed with. Its a lot of fun, It also makes me think of diner dash, but this time you get more employees and they are all really wicked sweet ghouls! Its fun. I also like the different rounds that's happen. You also can maybe customize the restaurant, and you can collect ghouls. :) which I like.

Creepy Cute

I really like this art style Its called candy gore, or creepy cute. Candy gore is like normal gore, but compared to the oozing gross inners of a body that you might find in say saw, what you find in stand is like fake candy bits. Fake oozing blood, or gummy body parts, pastel and pale colors. Its really neat to look at, and it doesn't make me squeamish. Normal gore makes me squeamish.

Its a really cute style. I really like it.
(it also suits halloween a lot.)